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Hey, it's been a while since I was on the Fediverse. Recommend me some folks to follow -- or, if you recognize me, some folks who might like to talk to me again

On the concept of "virtue signaling" 

The virtue signal is real. If you're here you probably do it and you should probably own it. It's unhelpful to think of those signs as Universally Good because even leftists don't agree on them.

But you should also recognize - I would say, you should also condemn, if you have a safe platform - when someone uses the signals of your ingroup to justify, conceal, or obfuscate doing harm. If they do so in your name, that's *your* reputation they're going to damage

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On the concept of "virtue signaling" 

In and of itself it's not a bad thing to show your colors. But it becomes insidious when it's hypocritical, or when it's used to justify harmful behavior and reinforce structural oppression. Like the "green beard" in green beard altruism, it is worse than pointless - in fact dangerous - if it doesn't come with the behavior it's meant to represent. 4/

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On the concept of "virtue signaling" 

Other signs may not be as explicit - I feel like I have some sense of what a person values when they say folx rather than folks - but they serve similar purpose. It's a shibboleth. A low risk, low effort behavior modification to say to that particular crowd, "I am safe. I am good. I am on your side." 3/

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On the concept of "virtue signaling" 

If an Evangelical Christian puts a fish decal on their car or business, that's definitely a way to signal their values to other people who would assess them and find them virtuous. It is an ingroup signifier. It lets people for whom it has positive meaning select for interaction with that person, and tells people who would not to stay away. That is its primary feature - a literal signal of virtue. 2/

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On the concept of "virtue signaling" 

I've seen the "virtue signaling isn't real" or "virtue signaling is admitting someone else is good and you don't like it" kinds of takes basically since the first wave of mastodon.social users

and while I also bristle to see the term used to criticize aesthetic choices rather than substance, I've come to conclude that fundamentally disagree with the idea that it's a non-concept, an ad-hominem, or somehow exists only as a right wing countersign. Hear me out 1/

It's hard to talk about "using very current social justice language to justify institutional oppression" without some shorthand for the concept.

This is your formal invitation to critically separate the substantive from the superficial

Went to look over the fence at the far-right side of the Fediverse since I hadn't in some years and it's only getting more insular and more hateful. Though I guess they've decided they're anti-porn since last I looked? Interesting swing

Got my offer letter today at long last. Decent raise but that's not why I took the position. I want to be where I can help the most -- and that's where I can stave off crunch, keep estimation honest, and help people work together instead of pushing each other around

Sure! We all want the answer! But Hashem doesn't owe us the answer, Larry. Hashem doesn't owe us anything. The obligation runs the other way.

online tabletop games, dependent personality, and criticism 

Listening to another Internet game master talk about apologizing to people who are unnecessarily aggressive, and I do wonder if my heuristic for who deserves an apology and who should be told to kick rocks needs further refinement

it feels weird to say "I should apologize less" but I really do spend a lot of time trying to please strangers who don't want to be happy with me

At a previous company, I used the word "dogfooding" talking to an executive about utilizing the bleeding edge of our product in our own facilities.

"We don't say dogfooding, we say drinking our own champagne" he condescended, weeks before slashing our "champagne" budget and laying off 80% of the office

I guess I have changed since last time I was here. I haven't made music in years. I got out of writing code for a living. I don't play video games as much. I've been monogamous for a while, too. I spend more time alone. I got back into marksmanship sports, but for some reason I doubt Fediverse people are into that. So I'm not really sure how to make friends in this part of the Internet to match my current interests.

I run a few tabletop games, which might be a good lead. I also do more cooking?

Trev boosted

the other day I went on a date with a woman from China who hasn’t been in the UK long and I asked where in China she’s from and she said it’s an area called Szechuan you probably don’t know it and I said oh like the sauce and she said yes how do you know about Szechuan sauce though and then I had to explain the fucking rick and morty thing and now I think she thinks coming to the West was a mistake

So uh, I've been in limbo about that position I interviewed for, for I don't know how long at this point, a month? I've been getting all my news informally and my sources assure me it's still in the pipe, in there, somewhere, and all my potential-futute coworkers vouch for me, but the organizational red tape seems endless and the silence is deafening. Please just get me an offer letter soon or tell me to stay put.

Spent a good portion of today listening to selections from Pink Floyd's early stuff and learning about the band's history (and Syd's departure) from a perspective I hadn't considered before.

On the trial verdict today 

This is accountability but don't mistake it for justice - we're a long way off from that yet

* toot renamed to post
* timeline goes vertical

If I just cut off the "release" part of my new title younger me would be very proud of my promotion, since he always wanted to be a train engineer

I used to give to gofundmes and ko-fis on the fediverse pretty regularly, not the least because trans healthcare in the US is awful and somehow going backwards

I haven't been able to in a while since the divorce but if you spot somewhere I can help, do let me know

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Trev lives here.